Day 24

What attracts me in love?

Being someone who has been in a long term relationship as I have. There’s one thing that makes my fiancée continuously attractive to me, his work ethic.

Even though he works a lot and I don’t get to spend a ton of time with him because of our differing work schedules, I love that he is willing to learn a new trade if he wants to. He’s extremely hard working and it’s very attractive; not to mention I love watching him work.

A few years back, he was in construction. But he got fed up with the owner of the business and quit his job. At the time, I wasn’t happy cause it really affected us financially and I was carrying the household and that was next to impossible with my income. He did finally find a job in something totally different, Window Tinting. He wanted to learn something new and he loves it and he wants to continue to learn new things about it and maybe open a shop one day. So even though it was a massive financial hard ship for us while he wasn’t working. It was for the best in the end.

Other things that attract me to my fiancée is humor. If you can’t make me laugh on the daily then we are done. It’s been 8 years and he still makes me laugh every day even when I’m mad a him. 

I think humor is one of the keys to a successful relationship! If you can’t make each other laugh then you have nothing!

Happy Easter

Good morning everyone! I hope you are all get prepped and ready for some amazing family time! I’m currently sitting on my couch in my pajamas. I was out late last night and had way too much sangria, so I’m still trying to recooperate from that!

Last night, my fiancée and I got invited to my best friends 3rd annual peeps decorating contest! What a fun little night with lots of wine and did I mention sangria!! 

Everyone’s diorama for the peeps was very creative! My fiancée loves The Walking Dead, so we recreated the scene with Negan killing off Abraham and Glenn!

Everyone was mad (Poor Glenn); but absolutely loved it! Haha. 

This was more of an adult thing; but it was a lot of fun and I think that it’s a great thing for kids!

1. Creation of Bobby “Bunny” Flay, it’s all about the cooking show!

2. Elle and Bruiser Woods.

3. Peep Show! Also flashing lights when it was presented!

4. Scene with Negan in the The Walking Dead. We should of won! 😉

5. The Peeps Zoo!

6. Recreation of Mean Girls. Aka The Mean Peeps!!

It was so fun! So great to let your creative juices flow!

When music inspires.

The guitar is quick and upbeat. You can’t help if you nod your head along with the strings.

The vocalist gets you inspired to care about the situation that is situated in front of you. You compare and contrast. Decide what’s worth revealing and what’s worth hiding.

 

Jazz gets me clapping in my head. What works and what doesn’t. it blends well, swish, swish. The smoky voice that tunes into your head, it’s 1920s in the modern age. Smoke feels the air with a cloud of desperation in her voice. Drawing you in and kicking you out.

 

A tease, your intrigued by the drum beat. Snap your fingers with the love of it in your head. Down beat, up beat. Click clack. You can’t help to love it. She wraps you in a cocoon of love and jazz.

 

Fun. Am I the right one? Ask yourself.

Lust is the counter of love; It’s a hit and miss. Love and Hate equates the sway of the voice.

Don’t let it blow you over.

One time cello, dark and deep. Precision on the tap of the drum and on the coat tails of the singer. She doesn’t mind.

Floral and fluid; tap your knee, tap you toes…one time.

 

Click your tongue. You can’t help it. Weed smoke feels the air. Rhythm runs cold through your veins. Gives you goose bumps.

Keep clicking, add in some snaps.

Get on the floor, explosion of clicks. Clapping. Wild hair, drum beat keeps the pulse in the air.

Tell her your needs, be wild.

Choke on the beat that surrounds you.

Day 23

This is a loaded question!

Everyone dreams about what they would do if they won the lottery. In that moment, if I won I think everything I thought I would do would probably change!

If I won the lottery tomorrow, I would definitely quit my job and move out of New York! My fiancee and I want to go south somewhere like Virginia or South Carolina. I would donate most of my current furniture to a good cause; and buy new stuff. But nothing to incredibly expensive; just new stuff. I would buy a house, one my fiancee and I could grow into. Something nice, but no mansion or anything over the top.

I would definitely get new cars for the both of us. I would be fine with a Volkswagen Beattle! 🙂 Then, I would pay off all of our outstanding bills. I would leave nothing with a monthly bill unless i’m unable to pay ahead.

I would buy my parents a house and new cars and I would start a college fund for my sister. I have a step sister who lives back in Iowa and her mother works odd jobs. I would also begin a college fund for her as well. One that I CONTROLLED, and I only had access to and it would only go towards to any college bills; nothing else! I’ts unfortunate that I would have to be that strtict; but people like to take advantage of generositiy when it’s given.

With situations like this; people come out of the woodwork when things like this happen. As much as you want to help everyone, you can’t!

I would plan my ideal wedding; get married wherever I want. And if you can travel for it, great. If you can’t; well sorry. Even with millions, I don’t think that I would want to spends 50,000 on a wedding. Just the dress I want, and in a place that would make me happy and that’s enough.

After my wedding, I would travel with my fiancee. Doing all of the things that have ever been on my bucket list. I would go to London, Paris, Greece, Thailand, Canada, Hawaii, Amsterdam, Sweden, New Zealand, Spain & so much more! I would also book a surprise trip for my family. To all of the places my mom ever wanted to go! She has sacrificed so much for me and I think I would want to repay her with something she would never forget!

That’s my ideal Lottery plan! But since the chances are slim, I’ll stick to reality and try to accomplish my dreams logically. But a girl can dream!

Fashion Fail.

Today, my mom and I went to Danbury Fair Mall in Danbury, CT! One of the best malls that’s close to where we live that actually provides decent shopping.

I went with this illusion that I would found some great pieces to add to my wardrobe! I couldn’t have been more wrong! Holy crap! Everything that I tried on looked absolutely terrible in everything. I’m bloated cause I’ve been eating way to many carbs. I just can’t!

So I walked out of the mall only spending 15.00 on lip wax, nail polish and a pencil sharperner. Good Day!

Word of advice, don’t eat carbs…well…never and never try on clothes while you bloated. Cause I felt like a massive beached whale; and looked like one too.

I did somehow manage to get a good selfie, and I’m sharing that with you! So I guess that was my constellation prize for the day.

I have a tendency to buy things just because and there’s a chance that I will never wear it again. So I’m trying to get better about not buying things just to buy them. I want to love them and it’s something I will wear on a frequent basis cause them it’s just a waste of money!

I work in retail and I always tell my guests…
“Do you love it?” If they don’t say yes right away; then I tell them to not buy it. Cause otherwise it’s going to sit in your closet and basically collect dust. So I’m trying to take my own advice I guess.

My advice for the day: Learn to dress for your body, and learn to say no to yourself!

img_0180

Day 22

My worst habits.

1. I pick at my nails all of the time. Not sure if it’s a nervous tick or what, but I have been doing it since I was a kid! So I always get my nails done so I’m less likely to pick at them if they are all nice and pretty! 🙂

2. I will admit I can be pretty gosshipy. It’s mainly at my job; cause in the time I’ve been there there’s been so many changes and it’s hard for me to get past sometimes. I have been working on it I swear; I want to be a better person and now I go in and focus on just doing my job and leaving. If I can’t be the best version of myself then I can’t expect anyone else to be either. 

Those I believe are my two worst habits. I’m sure some other people in my life could come up with even more. Lol 

Xoxo

Day 21

I’ve been avoiding doing this post, mainly because it’s a depressing topic and who wants to write about something depressing. But I’m so close to finishing my 30 day blogging challenge and I will not quit right before it’s over; mama didn’t raise a quitter!! 

What makes me sad?

For me, abandonment makes me very sad. My dad abandoned me basically; he didn’t even show up till after I was born; by the time that my mom gave birth to me he was already with his future wife Lisa. Let me get something straight right now; I have no issues with my step mother, we don’t have a relationship, but I harbor no ill feelings towards her. My mom said anytime she had to call my father for things pertaining to me, Lisa was very cordial and Gary has told me on occasions that she’s the one pushing him to have a relationship with me. They have two sons together who seem great as well. The only person I have a slight problem with is my father. I grew up with a step father; until him and my mom divorced and I got thrown away like a piece of garbage and I wasn’t his biological child; so no need to maintain a relationship with me. Honestly it didn’t hurt me that much to be honest. My biggest issue with my biological father is that he is so involved in his sons lives and he can’t take 5 minutes to have a relationship with his own daughter and not involved at all in any of my formative years. So what did I do wrong? My father has always been worried about perception and how people see him. I didn’t meet any of my extended family on my dad’s until I was 19. 

My grandmother (his mother) has always kept track of me and kept in contact with me! She sends me cards every holiday and they always made an effort to see me. I try to stay in contact with her even more since my grandfather passed away in January 2016. 

The biggest feeling of abandonment was my high school graduation. I invited him and his wife and sons. He hadn’t been to anything else, but I figured he would show up for that since he missed everything else. Nope! My grandmother and grandfather showed up and she told me that he didn’t want to feel uncomfortable or judged! I will tell you that my grandmother on my moms side and my mom were not happy! They didn’t say anything directly; but my mom popped off the comment that this day wasn’t about him; and he should of not made it about him.

We still to this day don’t have a relationship. One year; he forgot to text me on my birthday. I got a text a few days later saying he forgot! I was thinking to myself that he would never forget his boys’ birthday. Made me feel unwanted and worthless. My feelings about my dad swing from one side to another. Sometimes I could care less that he isn’t involved in my life; but I’m getting married and it hurts to know that he may not even show up for it. I’ve already decided that he won’t be walking me down the aisle. He’s not a privilege he’s attained in the years he’s ignored his child.

I would give a lot to have a relationship with him. But his family is already perfect and there can’t be an illegitimate child there to mess up his perfect family.

Xoxo

Gourmet Doughnuts.

So being the millennial that I am, there’s lots of things that we are supposed to as millennials that no other generation would ever do. Like wearing panties for extra days to sell them to peeves who like that. (Watch Orange is the New Black or Younger.) But my generation is very trend friendly; if one person does it everyone has to do it, and document each step. I’m not much for this type of thing; or at least I try not to document each moment of my life, but sometimes you get caught in it. But when I friend suggest we go get made to order gourmet Doughnuts; well it was Doughnuts how could I not go.

We hit Glazed Over in Beacon, NY. First and foremost, love the atmosphere of this place. It’s small and cozy with dark wood and exposed brick. And in the back, there’s a section where you can actually watch them make your Doughnuts. Did I mention that it’s reasonably priced as well. You sit down with a sheet where you get to pick your glaze, toppings and drizzle! There so many options it’s crazy. Like nutella, fruity pebbles, salted caramel, marshmallow! List goes on and on.

The nice thing is that since they are made to order, they’re fresh and quite messy to eat! But it’s a magical experience! Not great for my diet at all; but I wasn’t passing up an opportunity to go and have Doughnuts!!

Attached are a few pictures that I took today!!!

If your ever in the mid Hudson valley I highly recommend popping into this shop!!

Glazed Over in Beacon, NY

Carpe Diem

I just felt the need to share; on the right, this is the journal I picked up in Danbury, CT. This particular journal perfectly depicts where I am at this point in my life. Where I need to seize the days that I do have.

I haven’t really yet discussed my slight addiction to journaling. I have around 70 completed journals. And probably double that amount that are probably started but unfinished.

I’ve been pretty good for the past few months about not purchasing new journals. But when I saw this particular journal; I just couldn’t resist!

On the left, my mom actually put this on her Facebook page, and I was like ‘Oh my gosh!’ I need to share this pronto! So here I am, sharing with you guys first! You should feel so privileged!

Definitely, Seize the Day! Use everyday to your advantage!

XOXO.

Day 20

What makes me happy? Honestly, the thing that makes me the happiest is making others happy. I live for it. For me, it can be grand gesture or something small. Last week, my mom and I were leaving the grocery store and a homeless veteran was sitting by the light asking for money. It baffled me that people were just driving right by him without a second thought. We gave him money; I don’t have a lot of extra money; but just the gesture of doing whatever I can to help someone in need made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! Almost like a shot of adrenaline!

Many other things make me happy, my fiancée for example! He’s my best friend, my partner in crime. No matter the circumstance, he can make me laugh, even when I’m really mad at him and he makes some lame joke; and I try so hard to not smile and bust out laughing. I hate him for it! 🙂

Photography is my happy place. If I need to decompress, I go out on a shoot. I especially love shooting nature photographs. Living in New York, there’s so much to take photographs of; especially when it comes to nature.

Happiness is a choice. Only you can create your own happiness. So whatever makes you happy, go out and do it and do it often.

 

xoxo.